From time to time I’m exposed to reality TV. Because a lot of the ratings are based on dramatic interaction between the characters, you see intense dialogue including advice giving. “Just do the right thing.” “I need the old you back in my life.” “You can do this. Just make it happen.” The striking feature…
Category Archives: Stress Management
4 Ways to Balanced Planning
“The best laid plans of mice and men…” as the saying goes. Here are some tips to find a balance between sticking to your plans and being flexible enough to accommodate unseen factors. Pay attention to your natural tendencies. When making plans, sometimes they just don’t happen. Perhaps something comes up or you find yourself…
How to Be Thankful This Holiday Season
What is thankfulness? We all have some idea of what it is. But when we talk about being thankful, what does that mean? What does it look like to “be thankful”? A general “formula” for being thankful Use this for anything you wish to actively be thankful for. Think of one thing you are able…
4 Ways to Make Change Easier
For some of us, getting where we need to go – literally or figuratively – can’t happen fast enough. Just like physically going from place to place, doing so emotionally, mentally, or behaviorally takes time. Here are 4 ways to help you to be patient with yourself while you are making a change. Think of…
Four Keys to Sustainable Change
While on a trip recently, I had an opportunity to talk with a young man engaged in his new life of sobriety. He said it was difficult in the beginning, which was only two weeks or so ago, but he is learning new ways to live. “The hard part wasn’t staying sober, because I was…
Acceptance Before Action: The Remedy to Giving Up and Avoidance
Acceptance is a funny thing. It’s easy to think that accepting something (for what it is) is the same as giving up. If you consider a situation that just doesn’t seem to have a comfortable resolution, what do we do? Perhaps we distract ourselves from it by doing other things. Or we pretend we don’t…
The Myth of Control: Taming Frustration Through Observation
Feeling frustrated can be thought of as a combination of two things: Expecting to have control + Not having control = Frustration And what do we hear ourselves and others say? “Just make them understand that you don’t have time.” “All you have to do is control your anger.” “Tell her she can’t do that anymore.”…
Four Questions to Better Decision-Making
Have you ever walked into the grocery store to buy toothpaste only to be met with a wall of possible choices? Facing choice overload. Choice overload, in our age of convenience, seems to be all around us. Do I want a shake with that burger? If so, what flavor? Will that be a swirl, or…
How to Choose a Therapist (Part 1): Initial Contact
Many people avoid things they are not familiar with, especially experiences where they may be unsure what they need to know to make the right decision. This can be especially worrisome when looking for a counselor who you can trust and you will feel comfortable with. This article is the first of a two part…
4 Benefits of Boundaries: Improving our internal experience
Setting boundaries is a way in which we can stand up for ourselves, say “no”, get our needs met, and keep ourselves on track. By setting limits with ourselves and others, we can also avoid being rude, becoming verbally abusive, and even earn respect from people we encounter. The four benefits listed below, however, have to…